5.1 Slow Moving Things That Run Faster Than A Toddler

faster than a toddlerI decided to watch an interesting cartoon with my toddler on a Saturday morning. I was supposed to be with a friend on a day like this; doing some dumbbell lift to make up for the days I missed at the gym, but had to stay back. I converted the day to one that requires staying around, while enjoying every moment with my lovely wife and cute little girl.

My little toddler of exactly 2 years, one month, two weeks, three days, and some hours old was so happy to have daddy around today. I could see the emotions all over while she held her body glued to mine as we both watch the funny cartoon. I pointed the TV remove to make a little adjustment on the volume and that was when the battle began. She wanted to adjust the volume herself and I surrendered to make peace. She battled with the buttons for some times and finally got lucky; pressing the volume key for ages. It took her about one minute to make one volume adjustment when we needed about seven. That’s about six more adjustments which would take around 5 more minutes. She’s just too slow – Who said daddies aren’t patient!

That’s even tolerable compared to watching my toddler getting down from the car – makes me want to scream like, arghhh! That is one thing a toddler would handle in a sluggish manner, and trying to drag with her might result in the ever clamoured World War III.

Slow Things That Moves Faster Than A Toddler

The Minute Hand of a Wall Clock

Yes, I just said that. As if that was even more faster. My toddler would spend an hour to get a one-minute task done without any feeling of guilt whatsoever.

Garden Snail

You probably know how this creature moves. It’s a sure bet to guess you are framing an imaginary picture of it moving slowly in your mind right now but I’m pleased to inform you that garden snails are faster; faster than a toddler.


That bony fish that has a bent neck, long head and a distinctive tail and trunk can be fast atimes; especially when you have to compare them to a toddler.


Slugs are very slow species found on land and seas. But as slow as they are, the speed is extraordinary when placed with a toddler. You can imagine how slow slugs are, as it’s been researched to have never reach a speed over 0.2 miles/hour.

Koalas bear

Maybe because of the food these creatures eat – They are usually very high and slow while walking. This very cute animal is way faster than a toddler.

To start guessing where Michael invented the Moon Walk dance concept from should be a story for another day. But once in a while, you felt the need to get a cool and fresh air outside before going to bed at night. You must have noticed some movements in the cloud too, right? Ok, that movement is faster than trying to make a toddler knot her shoes!

You got other slow objects or any other thing that moves faster than a toddler which I probably forgot to add to the post? – Kindly share with me in the comment section below.

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  1. You mean to tell me that a Snail is faster than a toddler??
    How come I don’t believe that…
    Is there anything snails are faster than??

    • lolz.. Here is just one of those hilarious posts out there.
      However, I don’t want to limit the objective of this post to “movement” alone. Like, You might want to compare some other activities by a toddler which you would agree with me they are slow at, when compared to the movement of a snail. (still, lol)

  2. Akpene Jacob says:

    I haven’t experimented some of this things so I wont argue with you, nice post though.

  3. wow thanks for this post you added more knowledge to what i knew before thanks

  4. Are you kidding me? Snails?????? How on earth haven’t i noticed? This might look weird though, but i think it is true to some extent. because, looking at the size of a toddler in relation to that of a snail or slug or any of those animals bar the bear, i believe a toddler should move faster, but, you never can tell, life itself is weird.

    Nice one Oluseye.

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