The relationships between parents and the children can greatly be improved when effective communication is in place in the family. Encouraging effective communication between you and your children play a vital role in measuring the level of happiness in the family. The family relationship is strengthened and a more understanding atmosphere is built when such is in place.
Children easily form ideas and beliefs about themselves based on how effective the communication between them and their parents are, and there is always a boost to self esteem when children begin to feel they are being heard and understood. These are several ways to achieve and encouraging effective communication for parents whose family relationship is most important to.
Tips For Encouraging Effective Communication Between Parents & Children
Lower to your children level during communication
When communicating with the children, you should consider coming down to their level for better understanding. Also, using simple words when communicating with them is as important as maintaining eye contact to show seriousness in every word you say. For very young children, you can dock or kneel down to achieve an eye contact when communicating. This strengthens their confidence to want to talk to you about almost anything.
Show willingness to listen to your children
Show the willingness to hear them whenever they have something to say, and whenever you feel they are going through something. Ask and persuade them to talk about it and offer a helping hand to their queries when need be. When they realized you are always giving them an undivided attention, they will always run to you first whenever they have something to say. Alternatively, when you focus on the phone or TV for instance while your children are trying to communicate, they feel unimportant and this is a great setback when trying to build a more effective family relationship.
While your children do the talking, it is important to state that listening to them should not come with any form of distraction. You want to allow them talk freely without interrupting. To show you are following, nod your head from time to time and pass gestures; smile as you listen along. Here’s an interesting part that makes them feel relaxed that you are with them.
However, there are times when you might feel tired or just not in the mood to talk; times where you have something else doing while your children are trying to communicate. Give reasons why it is not a good time to talk and set a suitable later time to listen to them.
Interpret their message to show they have been understood
Do a quick recap after they finished speaking about what their queries are. Confirm by asking if your summary is correct and make sure to get their acknowledgement that you are indeed correct. This is just to show them they are not talking in vain and that you have been listening all along. Especially when they knew you got their complaints right, they feel glad in anticipation that you definitely will come up with a very good suggestion.
Talk freely as you express your feelings
For effective communication, the two sides of the coin should be considered. While it seem parents have been doing the listening while the children talk, children should be willing to listen too. To achieve this, study your children mood and realize when they are happy. Sit with them when they watch the TV and come up with a story. Start with a talk about what they’ve learnt so far from what they are watching and be smart enough to divert the discussion. Tell them how you feel and what’s being going on with you too. Ask their opinion and ways to right the situation being discussed.
You should always settle arguments base on how you feel in a non-judgmental way. Don’t make them feel guilty for the wrongs they do. Instead, state your complaint in a way that shows how they made you feel. For instance, instead of saying “You are a bad kid for hitting your sister”, you should try something like “you make me feel sad when I see you hit your sister like that”. This way, you are making them feel responsible for their own action (in a non-judgmental way).
In conclusion, you should; from time to time, give your children the impression that you love and care for them. Children who feel loved and accepted are more likely to open up and share their thoughts, feelings, and concerns with you. When you shout, yell and spank them to every little thing they do, the courage to talk to you when they want to will ultimately disappear.