Every relationship will have been much easier if you understand without any doubt that your partner is meant for you alone. Nothing can be more sweater; as far as love is concerned, when you can boldly say your partner feels the same way you do.
This would as well save you a whole lot of troubles of having to realize you have just wasted your time with a player who eventually will hit your heart so hard with a gavel – break it without attending a court session.
Unfortunately, life has been designed to be like that. Not straight-forward and confusing by us – whatever you may think of it (You’re right).
In this regards, you may need to depend solely on intuitions, signals, and logic to determine if or not your partner is the best match for you.
Nevertheless, having a second thought about your relationship might land you in a terrible mess. In a lot of situations, this is completely normal, but special precautions has to be taken.
If you are really stuck to questioning the survival of your relationship, below are some vital signals that may mean your partner is the right one for an ideal family in the long run as seen on Bustle.com.
1. Your partner passes your second thought test.
Assuming your second thoughts have actually led you to break up with your significant other. Next, imagine dropping them off at the airport, knowing that you’re sending them off and that you’ll never see or hear from them again. “Deeply imagine this and pay attention to the physical sensations that arise in your body,”
Do you feel sad, devastated, maybe even a little panicky? Or do you feel relieved, happy, or very ambivalent?
“When we imagine into a future that doesn’t involve this person, we can collect clues about how we authentically feel about this person,” she says. “These feelings, combined with mindful self-reflection, time, and working on any internal or external factors that you or they may be contributing to the unhappiness of the relationship can be powerful in helping you to work through any questions and doubts you ultimately have about the relationship.”
2. You Feel Completely Safe And Secure With Your Partner.
It’s so easy to have second thoughts about your partner once the honeymoon period ends and you feel like you know everything there is to know about your partner. “At some point in a relationship, everyone might wonder if they’re settling or if they can do better,” Samantha Daniels, Dating Expert and Founder of Samantha’s Table Matchmaking tell. But if you trust them wholeheartedly and feel completely secure in the relationship, they may be the right one for you. Your relationship may not be as hot or you may not see eye-to-eye on everything anymore, but as long as there is a “strong foundation of trust,” Daniels says they can be the right person for you.
3. You Can’t Pinpoint Things That Are Going Wrong In Your Relationship.
When you have second thoughts about your partner, it may not even have anything to do with them at all. “Thoughts are things we say to ourselves,” – Dr. Danielle Forshee, doctor of psychology and licensed clinical social worker. “Our thoughts reflect our beliefs. Thoughts are things that we say to ourselves and strongly influence how we interpret behaviors of others and our expectations.” For instance, you may think to yourself, “My partner doesn’t put a ton of effort into romance anymore. Our relationship is on the decline.” But what are some ways your partner does put effort into the relationship? Making your coffee in the morning may not seem like a romantic gesture, but some people would love it if their partner was thoughtful like that. So if you’ve actually sat down and really compared your second thoughts about your relationship to the reality of things and found your relationship is actually pretty solid, that’s a good sign. As Dr. Forshee says, it’s always important to check yourself as your thoughts may not be consistent with the true reality of what is actually going on.
4. You’re Willing To Work At The Relationship.
“There are a natural ebb and flow to relationships, and overall, it’s the emotional connection that counts,” Daniels says. So if you are still willing to put in the work to make your relationship last and you still see a happy future with them, your partner may be “The One.” If you’re unsure, have a conversation with them. “Talk about your concerns and fears and see if you can work through things together,” she says.
5. You’re Not Afraid To Disagree With Each Other.
You may have second thoughts about your relationship if you find yourself disagreeing with your partner a lot. But it’s important to take a step back and really think about what these disagreements are about. “It’s normal to have disagreements with your partner,” Caleb Backe, Health and Wellness Expert for Maple Holistics. “It’s only when these turn into intense fights or arguments that you should reconsider that status of your relationship.” That’s why Backe says, one of the “surest signs that you’re with the right person” is having the ability to agree to disagree and not carry any resentment because of it. “It’s not easy to disagree and maintain unconditional love because we are naturally inclined to impose our thoughts and feelings onto others,” he says.
6. You Make A Great Team.
Competing with your partner can be fun, and for some couples, it can even keep their relationship fiery and interesting. But when you’re with the right one, there’s no competition necessary. “A relationship is how two independent identities merge to form a [stronger] unit,” Backe says. “It’s essential that you and your partner can work together.” So if you and your partner are a team and your strengths and weaknesses complement each other, that’s a really good sign that your relationship is the right one. This means you’re properly equipped to take on whatever life will throw your way.
7. Your Partner Isn’t Afraid To Be Vulnerable With You.
As Dating and Relationship Coach, Rosalind Sedacca, CLC would say, “When we don’t spend the time and energy to fully know our partner before committing to them we can find ourselves having second thoughts.” Communication is important to have in any relationship. It’s truly hard to plan a future with someone who can’t be vulnerable or open themselves up to you. So if your partner is comfortable being themselves around you and they can talk to you about anything and everything, they may be the right one for you. If the reason behind your second thoughts is your partner’s inability to open up, give it some time. “Be patient with one another,” Sedacca says. “Every relationship needs tweaking along the way, so don’t give up prematurely. You may be in a healthy relationship that evolves as you both do.”
Again, having second thoughts is completely normal. You should only be concerned if it’s keeping you up at night and causing you emotional distress, as Daniels says. Sometimes your thoughts and expectations can get the best of you. But if you can open up to your partner about how you’re feeling, talking things out can do wonders for your relationship.